“Love Your Neighbor”: Building a Bridge Between Saying and SHOWING LOVE

by F. D. Adkins

Her eyes open and a feeling of dread washes over her. She has to start the day. Just like yesterday and the day before, she has to make another revolution in her little hamster wheel running as fast as she can hoping the day will be different but knowing she is going to end up right back where she started. Taking a deep breath, she rolls out of bed onto her knees and asks God for strength. Please, Lord, give me the strength to get through another day. Help me one step at a time, and let others see You on my face.

She makes her way through the house tackling one chore at a time hoping to get most of it done before she leaves for work. Of course, she knows the sink will be full of dishes again when she gets home, and three more loads of laundry will be waiting. No one seems to notice how hard she works. A pang of guilt shoots through her chest. I am so blessed. I know I will miss this mess when it is not here anymore. Why am I grumbling?

Plodding her way through the lobby at work, she puts on a smile and greets the secretary. “Good morning!”

The secretary just nods. “Yep.”

She shakes it off forcing herself to keep the smile and trudges on down the hall. As she passes her boss’s door, she sticks her head in. “Good morning.”

He never even lifts his head or acknowledges her presence. Her smile fades as she steps into her office. With her face in her hands fighting to hold the tears, she falls back into her chair. I just cannot do this anymore. Is it too much to ask for someone to say a simple “Good morning?” A tear rolls down her cheek. I feel so selfish. It is just that sometimes I need to hear a kind word myself.

A sigh escapes her lips as she lifts her head. With a heavy hand, she reaches for the power button to boot up her computer when she notices the bright light filtering through the blinds. She crosses to the window and peeks through the slats. Suddenly, her lungs fill with air, and a real smile covers her face for through the window as she stares at the huge bright sun, she can feel Jesus say, “Good Morning.” Then her eyes drift down to a tree branch swaying in front of the

window. On that branch sits a blue jay in her nest with three tiny eggs. The bird’s small beak is opening and closing, and even though she cannot hear through the glass, she can imagine her song. As she gazes at the happy bird and hums the tune, she can feel Jesus say, “Today is a gift from me to you. Go see what great things we can do.”

With Jesus in her heart, she moves back to her desk to start the day knowing her real work is for her Lord.

***

How do we have a positive attitude that shows love when struggles in our own life bring us down? How do we continue to show love to those who reject it? How do we show love to those that we feel do not deserve it? A wide chasm lies between saying “love thy neighbor” and actually loving thy neighbor. How do we cross this wide chasm from words to action? This question was brought to me recently, and honestly, this gorge requires conscious effort to construct a bridge across. As I thought about this gap, I realized that I need to work harder on building my own bridge. So, I have searched the scripture and outlined some points to help me truly love as God has commanded me.

•  Remember that this is a command from God, not a choice.
  • “Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself: I am the Lord” (Leviticus 19:18 KJV).
  • “…’Thou shall love your neighbor as thyself.’ There is none other commandment greater than these” (Mark 12:31 KJV).
• Employ some psychology: mind over matter. What things do we do each day that we do not want to do? Give the government part of our money for taxes, go to work, pay bills…. Why do we do these things if we do not want to? We do them because we have to. If we choose not to do these things, there will be consequences. So… mind over matter…we do not give ourselves a choice. If we do not give the government their portion, we have to pay penalties or even jail time. If we do not go to work, we will not have money for groceries. If we do not pay our bills, someone will take our car or our house, or we may be sitting in the dark. While each of our “have to” lists may be a little different, we still all have things we have to do, and we do them without question. So, why would we question a direct command from God?
  • “Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth” (Colossians 3:2 KJV).
  • “(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God for pulling down of strong holds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:4-5 KJV).
  • “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue, and if there be anything praise, think on these things” (Philippians 4:8 KJV).
• If someone is difficult or grouchy, maybe there is a reason, and if we knew that reason, we would realize how much we need to show that person God’s love. A while back, I visited a certain place of business quite often, and one of the employees that worked the desk did not usually seem to be all that friendly or helpful. Of course, as a customer, I found this to be frustrating. However, one day I started talking to this person, and to say that I was humbled would be an understatement. You see, this conversation revealed that this person had lost her child earlier that year, and the more she talked, the more she poured out. She had so much pain inside that needed to escape. Yet, how many times had I seen her but not seen? How many times had I heard the sound of her voice but not heard?
  • “But blessed are your eyes for they see, and your ears, for they hear” (Matthew 13:16 KJV).
• See each person for who they truly are: one of God’s unique creations.
  • “But now, O Lord, thou are our Father; we are the clay, and thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand” (Isaiah 64:8 KJV).
• I love someone that does not love me because God loved me before I loved Him.
  • “Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another” (1 John 4: 10-11 KJV).
• The Bible says, “love your neighbor as yourself.” Hmmm… “as yourself.” In order to love someone as myself, I have to examine how I love myself, so I ask a series of questions. This is scary.
  • Do I love myself? Yes
  • Do I always like myself? No
  • Do I always have a good attitude? No
  • Do I sometimes do things that I am not proud of? Yes
  • Do I want good things to happen to me? Yes, Yes, Yes.
  • Do I want others to be nice to me? Yes.

Food for thought. I do not always like myself, but I still love myself. If I do not always have a good attitude, why would I expect others to always have a good attitude? If I make mistakes, why would I not expect others to?

People may reject our love, but how often is God’s love rejected. God understands rejection, but He still loves. If we want to grow spiritually and be more like Jesus, then we have to love even through the rejection.

***

In the opening story, the character reveals some frustration at the beginning because she wants her day to be different than yesterday and the day before. Recently, I read a quote that has been credited to Albert Einstein, but in actuality, no one knows who said it. Regardless, it makes a lot of sense. Someone said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results.” You know, that same daily cycle that seems to never end sometimes feels like insanity, or at least it does to me. So, in the time since I read that quote, I have been asking myself how today is going to be different than yesterday if I do not do something different to change it?